We are officially ready for her now - this past weekend we read our manual on the carseat and experimented with the teddy bear so that we could figure it all out and we also got our hospital bag packed. All of the weekly newsletters I get in my e-mail had been saying for the past couple weeks that bags should be packed by now but we just hadn't had the chance to get to it. Well, everything is now packed and I feel more than prepared. From everything we've read and heard, everyone says if you think you might want it in labor, pack it; better to have too much than not enough. Well, we definitely followed that, but I'd rather be over-prepared!! I think Mark laughed hardest when I came in and put a new thing of Lysol wipes in the suitcase; he said, "Really!?" and I responded with "Well, I need to be able to relax during labor and if I feel like something is dirty, I won't be able to relax!" Ha; truly though - it'd be a shame to be tense during labor when all you needed was a Lysol wipe!!!
Just the other day I was on the blog reminiscing way back to 15-20 weeks and stumbled across my post about the first kicks. I had mentioned reading online that they feel like "popcorn popping" and I said what a great comparison that was. I told Mark after reading that - it's no longer popcorn popping or butterfly flutters...now, it just plain feels like I'm getting kicked!! I guess that's to be expected with an almost full size baby!!
One thing that's been hard this week is trying to feel good about myself still. I had a bit of a meltdown a couple nights ago and told Mark I just feel massive and disgusting. What I wouldn't give to be able to shave my legs (and do it well!) and be able to paint my toenails again!! Well, I had my little breakdown and then got over it and now I'm fine again, but I had the funniest dream last night, which I'm sure stemmed from all of these self-image struggles...
So I don't remember anything about the labor and delivery or being at the hospital, all I know is that Adie was born and we were in the car. Mark was in the backseat with her and I was driving. We were headed to Meijer and when we got there, I said to one of the workers, "Do you have those belly bands that are supposed to shrink your hips/stomach back to normal size after having a baby??" She said, "Yeah we do...did you just have a baby?" and I said, "Yeah - 10:00 this morning!!!" She laughed and said, "Do you have everything else you need? Do you need anything for feeding her or anything?" and all of a sudden it dawned on me - I hadn't fed Adie yet, I hadn't even held her yet!! I was so focused on going to get my belly band that I had completly forgotten to hold her, bond with her, feed her, etc. She laughed and handed me the belly band and said, "Ours are half the price of the ones at Babies 'R Us". I thanked her, bought it and we left. After leaving, I realized that it was cheaper because it was a pattern to make your own. So, off to the craft store we went to get everything I needed to go home and sew my belly band. I don't believe that's a sign of what's to come by any means what-so-ever, but it sure was funny to wake up after that one this morning and be able to laugh at how much I've struggled with the "image" this week!
